keep - stop - start
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KEEP
Thinking ahead like a Grandmaster
Imagine you’re a chess player.
Every move you make not only affects your current position, but also sets up possibilities for future moves.
If you only focus on your very next move, you might miss an opportunity to set up a checkmate or avoid a trap.
Changing habits, and especially overcoming addictive behaviors, is just like playing chess.
You increase your chances of success if you plan ahead for all the potential opportunities to win a moment and avoid falling into a predictable trap.
Here’s an example of planning ahead to win your game of food chess.
The ‘after-work unbridled snacking’ habit
If you can reasonably predict, based on previous behavior, that you are likely to dive head first into the pantry when you get home from work, which leads to feelings of guilt over your pre-dinner blowout, which then develops into a “well-I-might-as-well-keep-going” mentality, try this:
Start planning your move at breakfast time:
- Pack yourself a small snack or meal to eat in the last hour of your work day, or in the car on the way home.
- Pre-make a snack plate and pop it in the fridge, so you have something to reach for when you arrive home which has been more thoughtfully prepared and portioned.
Keep the play in sight at lunchtime:
- Try having more meals during the day. If you normally have 1-2, increase it to 3-4. Find your binge-preventing sweet spot.
- Split lunch over two sittings, or increase the size of your afternoon snack.
The aim of the game is to plan ahead for this late afternoon hunger surge and keep it at a level that you can ride comfortably all the way to dinner.
Checkmate.
STOP
Expecting change to happen faster
When we think about changing our behavior, we often focus on our conscious choices and the effort we put in.
We think about the emotional or mindset shifts, measuring our progress by how ‘good’ or ‘bad’ we perceive ourselves to be, or judge ourselves on how quickly we can adopt a new habit - or abandon an old one.
It’s counterproductive to measure progress on how easy or effortless the process feels.
If something seems simple for others but challenging for us, we may assume we’re failing or not suited for the change. This perception can be discouraging, leading us to question why the change isn’t happening faster or why it feels so difficult.
So what should we focus on when undergoing change?
Behavior change involves more than just a shift in mindset—it’s fundamentally about a physical change to your nervous system.
Our thoughts, behaviors, and habits are all controlled through a complex network of neurons. The strength of these neural connections depends on how frequently they are used.
When you work on altering a behavior, your body undergoes significant neural reorganization. This process, akin to constructing a new building, takes time to stabilize and strengthen.
In the early stages of change, your neural network is like a young sapling in a forest of ancient trees. It’s fragile and requires time and care to grow strong.
Climbing the well-established trees may seem effortless, while the young sapling might feel weak and unsteady.
Be patient and persistent. Give your body time to grow.
Just as a sapling needs time to develop into a sturdy tree, your new behavior will gradually become a solid, dependable habit with continued practice and patience.
With time and consistent effort, the changes you’re working towards will take root and grow into a lasting part of who you are.
START
Visualizing what you want to happen
Psychologists, athletes, and performers have long understood the power of visualization.
By vividly imagining a desired outcome and mentally rehearsing actions and techniques in careful detail, you can enhance your real execution when the time comes to perform and ultimately, improve your chance of success.
Here are some of our favorite benefits of visualization
1. Enhanced focus and concentration
2. Increased confidence
3. Improved skill or behavior execution
4. Reduced performance anxiety
5. Improved goal achievement and motivation
They sound pretty helpful for behavior and habit change right?!
Here’s a real-life example of where you can implement visualization to stop out-of-control eating:
So you’ve worked out that when you go out to dinner and have any alcohol, it triggers a binge when you get home (very common).
You’ve made numerous declarations that you won’t order wine when you eat out, but time and time again, once that waiter comes around, the words “glass of chardonnay please” come out of your mouth faster than you can say “self-discipline”.
Despite your best intentions, the allure of that smooth, crisp glass of chardonnay seems to override your resolve.
It's as if the moment the menu is in front of you, your commitment to abstain evaporates, and the familiar ritual of ordering wine becomes a reflexive habit.
So how can you take back control of your restaurant decision-making?
Treat these seemingly small moments as if they were as important as an Olympic final and you were the gold medal favorite.
Before arriving at the restaurant, make a decision about exactly what you want to drink.
Make it something you’ll enjoy, don’t try to order the ‘healthiest’ option, your aim here is to just avoid being triggered to binge, not to be ‘perfect’.
If you don’t know what they’ll have, look up the drinks menu and find something more interesting than water, or plan to order a standard soda unless they have a mocktail that takes your fancy.
Now visualize ordering your drink. Practice saying “Virgin wine spritzer please” or “I’ll have a soda and bitters on ice thank you”.
Visualize the drink arriving, and how it will taste. Think about how much you’ll enjoy it, and how good it feels to have something more special than water.
Imagine these moments in great detail, add as much vivid color, taste, sound, smells, and texture as you can.
Keep cycling through this mental rehearsal a few times before arriving at the venue.
Perhaps tell your dinner buddy before you get there that you’ll be ordering XYZ to drink so you can bring the decision to life even more.
Each time you create this imaginary scene in your head, the neural pathways that will execute and control your desired action, will awaken and warm up.
Your mind and body will be primed and ready to go when it’s game time, and you’ll greatly increase your chances of success in the critical moment.
So try it. Think of a moment when you want to behave or act in a certain way and practice visualizing exactly what you want to happen.